O death, where is thy sting?
O death, where is thy sting? O grave, where is thy victory?
I Corinthians 15:55
Almost two weeks ago we received the news that Lowell’s father was fading quickly. He had struggled with health issues ever since he lost his kidneys over two decades ago. We knew things had been up and down the last few months and we had faithfully prayed for the patriarch of this Graber family. We loved Dad. The children loved Grandpa.
But it was time to say good-bye.
We sat beside Grandpa as he labored through his breathing. Dallas even did schoolwork with me there one day. The family took turns being with him so he was not alone. And they loved him through the valley of death, just like they had through the valleys of suffering the last 26 years.
It was a sad week. It was a beautiful week. For how can a believer stand on the doorstep of death with a loved one – and not be willing to let them go see their Jesus? Heaven gets so near you can almost hear the whispers of it.
Finally, last Monday, he took his last breath here and went where he wanted to go – Home. We are sad and will miss Grandpa with his quiet smile, his tractors and combine rides, but we are happy he can be where he is whole again. And with the One who saved his soul.
Ever since I joined the Graber family almost 21 years ago, they have become my family, too. Dad was special to us in many ways. He loved holding our babies – especially the ones who resembled his quiet personality and sat contentedly on his lap. Derek was the first grandbaby to enter the family and he got spoiled by all the attention. He and Grandpa loved riding tractor together.
Dad will be missed. But we can’t wish him back. While we weep, yet we have joy and hope that we will see him again.
One of the last things he told the family was “Meet me there.”
What a legacy he left behind.
And when we walked into the cemetery last Sunday to bury our father and grandfather, memories and feelings washed over me. Almost 20 years to the day, I was standing in this same cemetery. Only that time I was at the side of a dear friend who had lost her baby in midterm pregnancy.
I remember that day so distinctly. Life had seemed almost cruel. The sky was blue, the sun was shining, yet a precious baby had not even seen his mama. I had been asked to sing in a quartet and wave after wave of grief engulfed me. I almost didn’t make it through the song.
For at that moment in time, I was also losing my very first baby to miscarriage.
Twenty years have passed since then, but sometimes the grief still visits. As though we hear a tiny voice call down from heaven, “Don’t forget me.” From that sweet little person we long to wrap tightly in our arms. And know we will someday.
So while we say good-bye to Grandpa here on earth, he now is holding grandbabies on his knee in heaven. And how could we wish any of them back from that place of no more death? Yes, God is good – in the sorrow and in the joy, He is still good.
And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away.
Revelation 21:4
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Regina S says
Kendra I’m so sorry for the loss of your loved ones. My mother is holding my two babies in heaven too and is probably showing her grandbabies to your father-in-law. 🙂
I will hold your family up in prayer.
Kendra says
Thank you!
canderson814 says
This is a beautiful tribute. I’m so sorry for your loss, but I rejoice with you knowing you’ll see him again one day. And the same for your first baby. God bless you all as you grieve.
Joanna Yoder says
I’ve been reading your blog for many years, but never made the connection between your husband’s family & our friends until Jeanie sent family pictures to our church email a couple of weeks ago. Daryn & Jeanie used to live around the corner from us, and Daryn’s two youngest brothers have long been best friends with our two oldest boys. We now attend the same church where Daryn & Jeanie are members. We’ve been praying for the family through this time of farewell. You wrote a meaningful tribute.
Kendra says
We love Daryn and Jeanie! How fun to “meet” some of their friends!
Mark Otto says
Very well said. Mark Otto.
Kendra says
Thank you!
Linda says
What a beautiful way to remember your Father- in -law.
I, too lost my first child to miscarriage.
I’m 64 years old and still think about it. I hope to see him or her one day.
My thoughts are with you and your family.
Linda
Kendra says
Thank you so much, Linda! I am sorry for your loss, even though it was a time ago. Blessings!
Diana says
Dear Kendra,
I am so sorry for your loss.
What a beautiful tribute to your father-in-law.
Diana